Skipping Stones

There was a small pond on my Grandparent’s farm that I spent time at while growing up. 

I remember cattails waving along the bank. I thought cattails were the most interesting plant I had ever seen. I used to ask my Grandma to get me some. I liked how soft they felt.  They were so fascinating that I’d pick them apart to see the fluffy white insides. I liked them so much I’d save some to bring back to the house to show the “others” and to take home. 

But the memory that has stuck the most is, skipping stones with Grandpa. 

My Grandpa was really good at it. I was amazed at how he could pick up a stone and send it dancing across the top of the water.  We’d count the skips together, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5!! 

I was so impressed by how the stones would fly across the water, only touching down briefly as evidenced by the ripples of circles they left from their journey. 

I wanted to be able to do that too. So, I asked him to teach me. 

He said, “You select a rock that is flat and kind of smooth,” as he picked one up, rubbed his calloused thumb across to loosen the dirt. Then he said, as he held it in his experienced hands, “You feel the weight of it. You get the balance of it in your hand. Then you turn to the side, swing your arm at the elbow and flick your wrist and let it go.” 

I watched again in awe as the stone seemed to tiptoe across the water.

I looked at all the rocks around the shore. They looked all the same to me. I picked one up at random, rubbed off the dirt and gave it a side toss like I’d shown me. 

It went PLOP!  With plenty of SPLASH!!! 

I remember trying and trying and trying. I would look at my Grandpa. Try to hold my arm and my wrist just like he demonstrated. Flick my wrist and let the rock go. 

Occasionally I could get the stone to do one or two skips. We both would be excited about my improvement.

On the times I got really frustrated with it not working, he would say in his gentle, knowing way, “it takes a lot of practice.” 

During one of our practice sessions, Grandpa turned to me and said, “The secret is knowing just the right time to let go.” 

It’s this secret tip that has come to have a deeper meaning for me now. 

It’s in this knowing when to let go that I struggle. Life gives us many opportunities to practice and experience letting go. We let go of children as they grow up and move out. We let go of loved ones as they die. Sometimes we even must let go of things we never expected; marriages that didn’t last, babies who didn’t survive, and dreams of how we thought life would be. 

God’s word tells us in Ecclesiastes 3:3-4 we will have times like this. “A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance.”

As I am in this time of learning to let go of my failed marriage, I am seeing it not as a one-time letting go, but as the skipping of a stone. I let go one moment at a time, until eventually, the stone; the disappointment, the pain, the loss is out of sight. 

Prayer: Dear Lord, thank you for reminding me that it takes time to let go and that You are here with me through this process. Thank you for the lessons learned around a pond that have more meaning today than yesterday. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.